Preface/Summary of the Original Story
The King, the Falcon, and the Drinking-Cup is a tale about a king’s near-death experience during his hunting trip. While chasing the deer, the king becomes separated from his entourage. Fortunately, the king is not alone, for he has his trusty falcon at his side. Throughout all of his riding, the king finds himself parched and stops to fill his cup at a slow-dripping stream. As the king is about to take his first sip, his falcon knocks the goblet from his hands. This pisses the king off. He fills his cup once more and the falcon knocks the cup again. The king (who must have anger problems) throws the bird to the ground which kills the poor falcon. At this moment, an attendant reunites with his king and obeys orders to hike up the hill to retrieve the king some water. When the attendant returns, he informs his majesty that there is a dead dragon poisoning the stream. The parched king feels an overwhelming guilt for murdering his loyal falcon.
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| Slain Dragon. Source: Wikipedia |
Slay the Beast
Prince William sat in the royal garden pondering his future.
My mother, the queen, continues to pester me. She is incredibly intent that I find a princess of my own (I think she wants grandbabies stat). I understand why she is anxious. It is very important that I find a strong queen to rule by my side…when the time comes for that…sigh. The only lady I care to pursue is locked in a tower that is guarded by a dragon. Yeah, yeah, yeah…I know…haven’t heard this story before. Humph. There must be a way to save her and win her hand and heart.
As the days passed by and William continued to analyze different approaches in order to save the beautiful princess, he finally had an epiphany.
I’ve got it! I’ll hold a competition to find the finest warriors. With this team we may slay the devil dragon who torments my lady.
After many weeks of rigorous training on the field and long nights of studying battle strategies, the prince joined his entourage in the courtyard. It was finally the day to set off on their journey. William knew that he and his soldiers were well prepared to face the scaly beast.
So they set off and traveled with little sleep and frequent challenges, and at last, they reached the base of the mountain where the princess resided. The men discovered a stream where they filled their canteens one last time before their long climb up the rocky slope.
This is the moment! Today my men and I become heroes and I will earn the princess’s love.
The men reached the peak and stood face-to-face with a ginormous, olive-green dragon.
“What brings you to the high skies that are so true and blue?” hissed the dragon.
One of the guards accidentally released an arrow which ricocheted off of the dragon’s shiny scales.
“Ohhhhh. You men think you are so noble and brave. Do you think that I have not faced many like you? Are you so ignorant to think that you will slay me?” the dragon asked.
“CHARGE!” Prince William exclaimed.
And so the brawl broke out with metal clashing on scales and arrows soaring through the air. A trail of blood followed the battle, but before Prince William's blood could be spilt, he stealthily snuck underneath the dragon’s belly and stabbed his sword through the soft skin.
The dragon screeched a horrifying cry and jumped from the rocky ledge, tumbling halfway down the mountain.
Prince William bolted to the tower and released his beautiful bride to be.
Many, many years passed by and King William found himself craving a hunting trip.
I have sustained many months of work and stress. It’s due time that I treat myself to my favorite hobby; hunting! I’ll need to be sure to tell the servants to fetch my loyal falcon as he can see distances that I cannot.
The castle staff round up all the necessary tools for King William’s hunting trip and the entourage set off to track the forest game.
Look! There is a quiet deer in the shadows of the trees. This one is mine! Oh, shoot! It saw me. I bet I can outrace it and shoot it down. My men probably won’t keep up, but no matters! I have my trusty falcon with me.
William foolishly left his attendants to race after the deer. The deer was fast and agile and easily outran William's horse. After many minutes, William found himself dying of thirst!
How convenient! A stream. Where did my gold goblet go? Aha! Here it is. Wow….this stream is literally dripping at the speed of molasses. Finally. A goblet full of fresh, clean water.
William's falcon flew off and knocked the water out of the goblet.
“You clumsy ball of feathers!” William angrily yelled.
As soon as the loyal falcon touched back on the king’s forearm, William threw the bird to the ground. The poor falcon did not have enough time to extend his wings and snapped his tiny neck on a rock.
Stupid bird. It was as ugly as a pigeon anyways. I’ll just sit here for another ten minutes to quench my severe thirst.
The king gulped all the water from his cup…
Finally, I am satisf.....
…and collapsed dead.
The hunting party caught up to the deceased king and immediately began searching for the source of death. After many hours, one of the attendants came back from climbing up the mountain where he had found a dead dragon who was poisoning the stream.
Author's Note
I created a story that precedes to the King, the Falcon, and the Drinking-Cup (which is why I included the summary of the original story before my story). In attempts to craft some subtle humor, I chose to tie the dragon’s death to the king. Once the dragon’s death occurred, the story line remains fairly similar to the original, however I introduced Karma by killing off King William.
Bibliography
“The King, the Falcon, and the Drinking-Cup” by Maude Barrows, from Bidpai (1908). Web Source: Internet ArchivGoogle Books
Hey Emily! I liked your story a lot and you added quite a few details that made the story so much more interesting! I thought it was so sad that the king killed the falcon just because knocked his cup over. I think you should expand your author's note and explain the original story so we can understand your version. Overall, you did a really good job and I liked it a lot! Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteHello!
ReplyDeleteSo I have not read any of the Un-Textbook material, or even the storytelling posts that have resulted from it, until now! I like the familiar, casual dialogue you used throughout the story, as well as how modern you made the speaker’s thoughts feel (no use of “thy, thou, etc.) I enjoyed having the explanation for how the dragon came to be slayed, but you might consider having the story of the dragon’s death come first, since it happens first. You could also consider making a clearer break between the two stories, because I was pretty confused for a minute there. Great job, though.
Emily, You added so many personal details to this story that gave it a very nice touch. I agree with Valerie's comments as well regarding how easy it was to read this story not having read the original story but it did seem as if you had a great sense of the original story. Agreed again with her as well that using the thought process in a more modern light instead the ancient train of thought and unmodern language.
ReplyDeleteI read this story earlier in the week and it's so sad :( I love how creative your re-telling is! Making a story out of a story is so much fun, and you did a lovely job with this one!
ReplyDeleteIn the first paragraph of your story, "persue" is actually spelled "pursue."
In the last paragraph, "alas" is an expression of grief or pity, so "at last" would fit better there.
You ended the story on a cliff-hanger, which of course makes me want to read more! You wrote very concisely, and I liked your variation of sentence structures and lengths, paragraph sizes, and intermingling of thoughts and storyline. Good work! :)
Hey Emily,
ReplyDeleteI loved your storytelling. I think my favorite line was “This pisses the king off.” I started cracking up laughing the second I read that. What I liked most about your story was the way you somewhat summarized it and then wrote a short segment from what the prince was thinking. It definitely made the story more interesting and humorous. Great job!
ReplyDeleteI thought it was a nice change of pace to see that each of your storytelling posts were so different. You used different fonts on each one which was a nice touch and made your blog stand out from some of the other ones that I’ve looked at. I think you’ve done a really good job and I think your stories were really unique and different from the ones I’m used to seeing because I’m in the Mythology class so kudos!
Hi Emily.
ReplyDeleteI really liked the story you chose to write. Several parts of your story were quite funny. “I think she wants grandbabies stat.” this line cracked me up! Your story was very well written. It made me wish I had tried the un-text book. What a trusty falcon companion. Too bad the king wasn’t bright enough to realize something was up. Great job on this one.